Love and other Angry Catastrophes

Okay.. I won't lie to you.

The image below? I Photoshopped it. There was no holy matriomony between Katy Perry and Angry Puppet. Sometimes Angry Puppet likes to use Photoshop to construct fantasy lives for himself.

I wonder, sometimes, whether My Katy will ever come to her senses and leave Russell Brand (or as I like to call him, Russell Bland. Take that, Russell!). I do suspect Katy doesn't know what's good for her; one need only take a look at her dubious sartorial choices to understand this. There might be a few kangaroos loose in the top paddock, is what I'm saying.

So, I have prepared myself for heartbreak. It doesn't matter anyway, really. My first volume of poetry is just about near completion, and once it gets published, Angry Puppet is going to be up to his neck in pussy. I will be wading through pussy for months. Pussy as far as the eye can see.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go alphabetise my paperclip collection. Over & out.

ANGRY VICTORY.

Behold!

See, Russell Brand? See? Katy made her decision. She chose Angry Puppet. I, too, can look dapper with a silly suit and an even sillier hair-do.

ANGRY PUPPET PREVAILS.

Still angry.

A pictorial representation of Angry Puppet's love life

Angry Puppet in Excel

Open letter to bill gates. master puppitier and head microsoft doogle bug.

Dear Billuppet,
Why do you hurt me like you do?
Do you want for a better life without bars, grids and sort ascending? Because i do. Why do you make me ask office managers for advice when you know they will use it against me to make me feel more like a micro fool. I hate you and your autosum ways.

Yours in Freezed Pane,

Angry Puppet

Just an aside on my poetry:

I am aware that a lot of my poetry is quite cryptic and experimental. It is okay if you don't understand my poems straight away. Some people aren't very sharp; I have come to terms with this, and so should you.
But persevere nonetheless; much like Angry Puppet himself, growing to understand Angry Puppet's poetry is a deeply rewarding and nourishing experience.

\m/

angry puppet has a lot of feelings

if i were a sound, i would be a sigh
if i were a tree, i would be a bonsai (bound, trapped, oppressed)
if i were a bodily fluid, i would be a tear, rolling down your face
if i were a social networking site, i would be myspace (desolate, abandonned)
if i were a serial killer, i'd be john wayne gacy, the crying clown
if i were a hand gesture, i would be a thumbs down (or maybe devil horns \m/)

sigh.

by aa puppet.

Angry Puppet got shit-faced last night

Don't come near me. I have a thumping great hangover. Angry Puppets do not like hangovers.

I feel disenfranchised this morning. I didn't even bother to brush my hair before leaving the house. And that is really saying something, because Angry Puppet takes pride in his appearance.

Linens

The linens on my bed are filthy, so today I bought some new ones.
That's just how Angry Puppet rolls.

The Perry-Brand Disaster

This does not please me at all.
To be frank, what is Russell Brand but a low-rent Angry Puppet? Observe:

Why not me, Katy Perry, why not Angry Puppet?
Am I not pretty enough? Is my heart too broken?

Angry Puppet: A haiku

Me, Angry Puppet
Stinking ugly beast am I
Get off my web page

Angry Puppet at a glance

I was born a Scorpio. In many ways, I am a text-book Scorpion: intense, poetic. Magnetic. Highly charged, sexually. Beneath my steely exterior burns the passion of a thousand fiery suns.

Poem

Angry puppet

Perplexed puppet

Ugly puppet

Frazzled puppet

Caught-in-the-rain puppet

Don't-fuck-with-me puppet

Disillusioned puppet

Needs-a-Pimms puppet

by Angry Puppet

Mistaken Identity

I would like to advise there is a blog called angrypuppet.blogspot.com. Please note: This is not me!! His blog is not angry, and it is only mildly puppety. I am angry-puppet.blogspot.com. Observe the hyphen, make friends with it.

Love,
Angry Puppet.

Semi-Colon Blues

If Angry Puppet were a punctuation mark, he would be the semi-colon; misunderstood.