Letter from a fan.

Dear Mr A. Puppet.

I am disappointed that your hiatus has lasted so long. Recently, whilst trawling the information superhighway, I came across a really rough patch of boredom. I sought solace in the comfort and wisdom of your celebrity blog, only to be cast out amongst the bitter nasturtiums of an un-updated web page. Keep it fresh Mr A. Puppet, we're all riding your coat-tails with our mixed metaphors.

Love,

A. P. Servant.

Dear Puppet Fan #2654,

I apologise for the lack of puppet-related activity on the internet recently. If you cast a look further down my blog you will see that on Sunday I reported I was suffering from a very serious infliction known as Swimmer's Ear. Sure, you will hear of a few wowsers here and there brushing this condition aside as merely an "ear ache". I thumb my nose at you, wowsers! I can assure you, Puppet Servant, I'm a very sick boy. The last few days for Angry Puppet have involved a lot of darkened rooms and bed pans, gentle sobbing and ringing a little maid's bell so my PR team could fetch me flat lemonades and chicken noodle soups. Please believe me when I tell you that Swimmer's Ear is no walk in the park.

Anyhoodle, it seems the worst of it is behind me. Today I managed to muster the strength to hit the "On" button of my laptop. But even that drained me of energy, and so I am presently dictating this entry to PR team member Richard, whilst PR team member Jenny fans me with a palm leaf. Whether I shall ever regain 100% of my strength is yet to be determined. Baby steps, I suppose.

Oh, also, I was suffering from a spot of Puppet's Block. Luckily you wrote me your email, and thus, gave me something to talk about. So kudos to you-dos! As token of my appreciation, Puppet Servant, I will be sending you a 5% Off coupon for any of the fantastic T Shirts in our merch range**.

Live large. Til next time,

- Angry Puppet. 

**Not to be used in conjunction with any other offer. Angry Puppet reserves the right to retract his 5% Off coupon if he decides you look gangly, awkward, or just plain silly in one of his T Shirts. Angry Puppet does not wish for his face to be associated with such sartorial tomfoolery.